Well, today was the dreaded appointment. I knew in my heart what the results were going to be but I heard it from a "professional" today. We did indeed have a miscarriage.
Today, as I walked through the doors of my OBGYN's office with Lance, I thought "we should be here celebrating and getting to see our new life on the monitor" but instead through teary eyes I glanced around the waiting room in envy of all the other mothers or mothers-to-be with baby in tow or still as a bump on their belly. This is not fair. I have no clue as to why this happened to us, but I keep telling myself to trust in Jesus. I know that He has a plan and that His ways are better than my ways.
I can tell myself the things that I know all day long like: I know that something was probably wrong with this baby and it is the Lords way of handling it, or I know that God is in control, or I know that this is "common" but I also know that none of those things take this hurt away from my heart. It's a deep ache that I can't explain. It's a hole in my heart kind of hurt that I didn't even know my heart had a spot for. But I know that the Lord is faithful and He will see us through this difficult time.
Proverbs 3:5 says "Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart and lean not on your own understanding." That is my verse for today.
Keep us in your prayers.
Much Love,
Lance & Annie
Oh Annie, my heart is just breaking for you. You are such an amazing woman and such a wonderful light of the Lord - I KNOW He will bless you with children! I am praying for you and thinking of you, sweet friend. Please know that I am here...
ReplyDeletePsalm 55:22
Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.
Dear Annie,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear the sad news. I know that there are no words that can take away your pain.
Hang tight to your "knowing." It will get you through to more blessings than you can imagine. I promise! God will see you through.
In God's love,
Rene Williams
Annie! Sweet Annie! I'm so heartbroken to hear your news. I don't understand why God gets our hopes like this, but I do know that there is always a purpose when He does, and I hope that this loss can help you to draw that much closer to him in the place of your void. Medidate too on this passage:
ReplyDelete"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."
~James 1:2-3
I just read this for the first time after we emailed.God is close to the brokenhearted and thosed crushed in spirit..one of the verses that got me through a lot. I love you and know with all my heart that there will be more understanding to this in the future..it is hard to comprehend now but just keep telling yourself that God is in control..it doesn't take the hurt away but it will remind you that He IS in control! Love you!
ReplyDeleteAnn, It's mom! You make me so very truly Proud! You and Lance will be richly Blessed SOON!!!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazing to me. I love reading your words and knowing how you have grown up to be so strong. You , Ali, Savy and me are the real
Steele Magnolias! Keep Smiling! Love forever, me xoxo 01/29/09
sas, it's your sister. this is wonderful, reading your words and hearing even more from you. like mom says.. were the real deal steele magnolias. i love you so much sister. your such a strong woman and my own role model. i don't think i could have ever asked for anyone better. we've made it through so much to let our heads hang now.
ReplyDeletei love you sas.
keep your chin up, and keep that smile on your face.
<3 your adoring sister.
ali bird(:
Annie,
ReplyDeleteThere is no way to explain what has happened. And there are no words I can say to make it all better. I truly wish I could. You are a strong woman. Continue to lean on God through this time, wrestle with God, call out to Him, whatever it takes- He is big enough. He will see you through. In the words of Beth Moore, I'm believing GOD! I love you and Lance. You both are in my prayers.